Unhelpful Teen

I've often wondered what horrible little tricks I could pull if I was an exam writer. And since some of you might take this up as a career, this tip is EDUCATIONAL! YAAAAAAY!

A)           Add extra, irrelevant detail to cover up the actual question.

Example: Bob went to the shop and bought five cookies. He ate one cookie then decided to leave the others until later. However, Bob’s misbehaving kitten ate 2 and a half cookies while Bob was visiting his friend, Douglas. Douglas has a shiny new red bike. Bob invited Douglas back to his house for a cookie. Douglas’s father works in a bank. Douglas was hungry so he accepted Bob’s offer. Bob’s kneecaps smell like sausages. Therefore, Bob and Douglas ate three quarters of a cookie each. Calculate the mass of the sun.

B)            Write every question in poorly translated Chinese.

C)            Make every answer in the multiple choice test the same letter. (Everyone will have a mental breakdown.)

D)           Complain about personal problems in the questions.

Example:

For 4 marks, explain why my wife left me after a 34 year marriage. Also, my goldfish died this morning. Explain that too. Once you’re finished, and during the final five minutes of the exam, quickly scribble down the answer to the real question which is a 2000 word essay about photosynthesis. No matter how fast you write, you will fail. Have fun. J

E)            Have so much fun inserting wrong answers into the multiple choice forgot to add correct answer.

Example:

What is ten minus five? Choose a letter. You will get extra credit for drawing a picture of a monkey on a unicycle.

A)           3! This test is easy LOL

B)            Myreaction to this question. 

C)            What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!

D)           I WASN'T TAUGHT THIS IN CLASS!!!!!!!!!!1